to Give, Not to Receive

It is hot and humid ever... these days..

She went to class today, thought he wouldnt come.

Chit chatted with friends.. and saw him in the back seat.
Wondering if it was accidentally, they their shirts had the same color.
And accidentally, it was the shirt she gave him.
It was not, actually any kind of present, just simply a shirt she wore once, and she gave him back as she told him she might not use it.

This reminds her
some stories when people said about give and receive... and so living this life, you should give , and not expect to get something in return, rather than just wait to receive anything back in hopelessness.

She read them. She knows it. She gave. A lot (Is she such a selfish girl to mention those here?!)

And suddenly, she felt not right.
When youre giving something to someone, you always hope to get something in return... that's true.
But now, at this time, she felt miss her feeling of receiving something more than ever..
So long she hasnt got that feelings... even though people around her know how much she needs...

But thing that she needs seems so unrealistic..
Her crush is not crush on her
He has found his love somewhere

And now she keeps the words in her mind : to give but not to receive..

How to firgure it out?!

Introduced you to a friend
Wondering how silly I am

She's cute, perfect
And you seem swirl in to her... next

Restless... and it's hurt
Mentally and physically..

Wondering why...

Try to avoid talking to you..
But somehow, we just make it through...

Meet you
Here and then

Probably
Serendipity...

Surrender, should I some day?!

Ran into me unexpectedly,
That's how you make me feel completely Happy
How girly...

Realize how talkative
Is the person you conceive

Asking why so..
Turning away, ask me if i dont want though...

Just let it flow...

Things 'bout You

Whenever I see your smile,
No matter how mad i was, no matter how bad you treated me...
and how hard that tried to make it it serious..
I can't help smiling back...

As I know
The smiles are precious... (at least to me)
And as one day
Probably, I won't see those again...

When you did something wrong
Me or with friends
I feel really down...
Sad for what you do
Despair for what youve done...
Worried about you

Tried to avoid
Meeting, texting, calling you
Crazy

You said something
about life...
That makes me scared
Sometimes
That makes me feel disgust
And realize...

How terrible this life is
When treating with human

Should I
Move closer to you?
Or as people around me say
'Away from him as long as you can'?
Confused

Are you good for me?
Or as a jerk like someone used to be?
For some extends..
That possibly true...
As every time you let me down

For some extends..
That's possibly false
As the way you to me
Simply
Friend to Friend

Perhaps
I should let this out
Off what I can reach
Off what I can hold
Let it

Slip away....